One Day At A Time

You know, life just slips by you one day at a time. Sometimes I wonder if every mother looks at her little ones and feels the desperate longing to keep them just the way they are - knowing that one day she'll look at them, and they won't need her any more. That the smallest things she does which influence them so completely now - magnified a thousand times, will hardly budge their actions in only a few short years. Knowing that one minute she'll lose her guard and blink. And they'll be all grown up. And then she cries.

Then it doesn't matter how much sleep she gets, or how little housework gets done, or that she's going deaf because of the little voices crying in her ears. The headaches, the stress, the chaos - is worth having these precious minutes while her children are small and pliable. That's when you want to pile all of your little ones in your lap and just hold them and never let them go. But of course, they look at you like you've gone crazy, and just try harder to squirm out of your arms.

But that's what I want to know - How do you enjoy these little moments (where your babies are squirming out of your arms or screaming their heads off) when you know that those very moments are limited? That one minute they'll be there for you to savour and then one day they'll be gone. Forever.

I know, I know. I'm probably worrying too much. After all, my oldest isn't even three years old yet. There's still a couple years before she starts off to school. My son is still in diapers and probably will be for another year.. my baby is barely sleeping through the night. But time keeps ticking, the days keep going, and my little ones won't be little forever. They won't be little for very long at all.

But don't let me get you all depressed or anything. There are more cheerful things to think about. For example: In the last two days, Emma's schedule has seemed to change into something absolutely reasonable! I'm so excited - hopefully it's not just a chance occurrence or anything. Last night she slept for SIX hours solid - 11:30 to 5:30. On top of that, when she woke up to eat, she managed to make the feeding just 15 minutes long and then without further ado, she went right back to sleep until 8:30. Of course if I had been thinking clearly I would have put her back in her bassinet at quarter to 6 and snatched another couple hours of quality sleep, but I was sure she'd want to eat again soon. After all, 15 minutes isn't much of a meal. So I kept her beside me and tried to get her to wake up enough to eat more, but she wouldn't budge and I finally put her back in her bed around 6:30. And the alarm went off at 7:30, and the other kids were done being quiet and waiting for Mommy to release them from their room by 8. But hey! the six hours last night were priceless.

That was last night. The night before, was almost as good since Emma slept for two solid four hour stretches and only took half an hour to eat both times she woke up. And all day long yesterday she seemed to follow everybody else's schedule. She ate breakfast when we did. Lunch when we did... she had an afternoon snack while the other kids were finally sleeping, and then she ate supper when we did. She stayed awake and played or just stared at stuff after she finished each meal, and didn't sleep for too long during the day - except when it was afternoon nap time which is exactly what I would like. In fact, it seems just too good to be true, and perhaps it is... she is only two and a half weeks old. But it's been a wonderful break for me to get some real rest in the last two days.

Dolly and PC are still adjusting to sharing a room during naptime, and it's very slowly getting better. They still play for a long time and I have to go in and tell them to go to sleep every ten or fifteen minutes for the first hour, but eventually they do go to sleep. Much to my frustration, I think I'll have to eliminate PC's morning nap. I so love that little bit of quieter time after breakfast and before lunch, but PC is not sleeping very much if at all during the afternoon. And as much as I love my morning peace, I NEED a break when the afternoon comes 'round. I tried shortening his morning nap and putting the kids down later for the afternoon nap, but it's not helping very much and recently as soon as the older ones finally settle down, Emma wakes up for her 'afternoon tea' feeding around 4pm so my afternoon nap is very short or non-existent.

But I'm adjusting too. I've found that even 20 minutes of sleep for me, can really help. It's amazing to realized how tolerant you can be when you've had just a little bitty nap. I do have to go to bed as soon as possible after Emma does though, since I really need more than just a short little afternoon nap. Other than that, I love to watch my kids interact with each other. As you can see above, Emma is still the favorite baby sister. I actually got a few pictures of Dolly and PC loving their 'new baby'. And thankfully, Emma hasn't displaced anyone either. PC and Dolly are still just as much friends as they ever have been. Below you can see them playing a 'big person's game' together. I'm so thankful for each one of my little ones!

And life is getting much better and more manageable just one day at a time.