Monday, February 08, 2010

Who Am I?

So, I'm taking my shower - my long overdue shower that usually lasts about 17 minutes since I have 30+" of hair to wash and it never hurts to shave once in a while.

But the tenant downstairs is doing laundry and my shower keeps losing temperature and water pressure. This is fine as long as I continually adjust the taps to compensate.

About 3 minutes in, I'm greeted by a blast of cold air and the bathroom door slamming open to allow a plastic donkey to be thrust past the shower curtain. This was so I could assure my son that he was probably right when it came to deciding whether the animal was a horse or a donkey (it's tail was missing and the ears weren't very helpful - they could have belonged to either animal).

Around the 6th minute of my shower, the door again slams open and PC's feet thump across the floor followed by another toy animal, "LOOK! Momma! I found a CHEETAH!!" he exclaims from the other side of the shower curtain. "Yes, now go out and close the door. I'm TRYING to take a shower!"

At minute 10, I'd just finished thinking, 'Hm, maybe I'll get to finish my shower in peace. Wouldn't it be nice to have my OWN bathroom?' when the door opened and Emma's voice announced, "Mama? I pri-thy sthick." she accompanied this statement with a cough and closed the door as she left. 4 seconds later she stuck her head in again to give me the solution, "I need meh-ih-cine." "Emma, you're fine, now go out of the bathroom." She did for three more seconds before sticking her head in again to chirp, "Pease I hab can-ee?!" "No, you can NOT have any candy - remember? you're sick. Now go OUT of the bathroom."

Minute 14 - another blast of cold air, slamming bathroom door and visit by a plastic animal. "Mama, we have a HYENA!" I think it was really a wild dog, but I just told PC to go out and play with it and let me take my shower by myself.

At this point I started running out of hot water.

If I could just lock the bathroom door... except we only have one bathroom and I can't have the toilet inaccessible - you never know when somebody just CAN'T wait a few more minutes.

"LOOK, Mama! a monkey!!


  1. Well, at least they didn't strip down and try to climb in with you!!!! I try to take my showers after Frank is home... he puts the kids to bed, and I sneak off to shower...even though we have a master bath, I still feel like I have to keep the door open so I can keep an ear out for calamity, if I'm showering while I'm home alone with the kids.

  2. 17 minutes is pretty fast when I take that hair length into account! Maybe someday we'll miss the shower visitation! I'm sure we will have rosey memories, but for now...I try to shower before Andrew leaves for work which doesn't always happen. Then I put up with Liam's visitation and attempts at climbing in with mommy while I keep praying Elijah won't start screaming and start my milk flowing...

  3. Wonderful writing. :) Loved the story, thanks for sharing stuff like that here. This post cracked me up!

  4. That's so funny - I loved it!! Someone told me before I had any kids that the thing they missed the most was just time alone and privacy. I can now relate to them and that is one of the things I miss the most too. :) How will I ever handle more kids??

  5. Oh my! That is too funny! (Obviously you must have found at least a little humor in it too...!)
    Humor keeps us from going crazy I think! If you don't know whether to laugh or cry, just laugh.

  6. Just another day, right...thanks for the laughs!